Surrounded by Anger

Surrounded by Anger

The ones who hunger does not want to listen to words of wisdom.

Just as the ones who wage war listen to no peace….

Anger an emotion, so strong in its nature to destroy; it consumes everything in its path. I have seen the meek being bathed by Fear by its sheer presence. Anger; a horrid moment of spur is met with an objectionable response. However, it is still one of the many feelings we feel every day.

Anger is like fire it consumes everything in its path and will only stop when everything is destroyed.

Anger, an emotion never changes and it characteristic remains the same throughout the ages, a feeling of love or affection 100 years ago is the same now, it neither grows old now does it evolve.

So if emotions are the same then all of us should react the same way in every situation, right? Wrong. Every day we are bombarded with hundreds of emotions, lust, greed, love, irritation and our logical thinking tells us how to react to all these feelings.

Even though we feel the same emotions, how we react to these emotions is based on how we grew up with them. Someone raised in an environment of compassion, will spread compassion or at least most of them would.

They say the world is getting closer, they say we will all be one, one day. But then why is there so much killing now than ever before?

If we live in a surrounding of compassion and spread compassion then living in a surrounding of anger will spread anger. I see the world around me and the read about the countries beyond the boundaries of my own. I don’t see the spread of compassion from the boundaries of Asia, Gulf, Africa and reaching the European continent.

If we talk about fighting for justice and the war is waged against the axis of terror or it’s a holy war as claimed by religious fanatics. Why would someone have so much of anger for one another or to another religion or toward a country, as to hate them so much that even if hundreds or thousands of people die, they still won’t stop?

We must put a stop to this antagonism and one way of doing it, is to control ourselves. We must spread compassion like a disease that will one day infect people’s rage.

There is a famous Chinese proverb “Never write a letter while you are angry.” written words can never be erased just as our actions can never be undone.

Hateful action toward other people is like stabbing someone with a dagger. The wounds may heal but the scars will always remain.

It’s time we bring a change. If not, change will come on its own taking us to its realms of uncertainty.  

You will be buried under a pile of stones, if you collect every hurtful thing people say to you. Use these stones carefully by building a wall, one day you will have a house to live in. - Lisbon

To find ME

To find ME

I was in talking to a colleague the other day and she spoke to me of God and how he will bring salvation to everyone’s lives for they who seek him.

She used verse from the bible and she believed what she thought as the right path to follow - for all to follow.
She followed the path of prayers and listened to the priest preach on many occasions, for many years. I was just wondering is it because she needed to find God because her father passed away a few years ago and her Mother last year after suffering from paralysis for a very long time?

Did the Church inspire her to knock on their doors after she made multiple wrong investments or was it her futile efforts in searching for a man of God to marry but she said it’s difficult to find.

Why do we seek God? Did the creator create us, only for us to run around seeking him? Or did he create us, for us to seek ourselves to find who we are, and to find happiness in the world he created for us. What she needed was to find her self; she needed to find happiness from all the years of suffering.

I knew of a another woman who drifted from one bad relationship to another and every time she introduces the new man in her life she said “he is the one, my soul mate” and after a couple of months she was clawing him with her vicious verbal venom.

I told her she can’t drift from one relationship to another and tell the world I am searching for love. It seems finding a man was not really difficult for her, it’s her choice of men that she went out with was the issue. She needed to know what she really wanted out of the relationship.

After three failed marriages and a couple of broken relationship she still trying hard for that “ONE” guess he won’t be coming knocking her door soon.

Now, since I had been talking about the whole world but my self, here is my story. I was in an 8 relationship and thought she was the one I would marry and raise a family with her one day.

I would work hard toward this dream, which seemed so real at the time. But she had others things in mind. She wanted a rich life and the extravagance of the rich and famous. She would demand and I would try to give in, until I just gave up. We broke up and I broke down. I left my job and started to write and kept writing for hours, days, weeks and finally for 7 months, until I finished a novel. When it got published, I was in no pain anymore.

It seemed like I didn’t want the world to see me in pain and I wanted to rid of it on my own, for me to write was the only way out. I kind of grew up and realized that at the time of my pain my silent cries to God and her, brought no relief, nor did God speak to me nor did she pick my phone.

What spoke to me was me my inner me. We picked the pieces of my life and joined them together. I believe that if we find ourselves we won’t need to look for someone to find it for us.

A great saying from an infamous man (Hitler) who once said “never beg for support from others, stand alone and face life as a race, then everyone will follow you.”

Birth

 Birth 
 
It was her I blame for what she did to me; she was responsible for everything that happened and will happen to me. I remember when she first whispered in my thoughts like they were my ears. 

“I am the one for your emergence and separation from the body of your mother that is going to happen.” 

“Who are you?” I thought from deep within the one who tendered me. 

“It was my act that will bring you forth.” She whispered back, she was reading my thoughts.

“Now nameless one, her opening is ready for you, now!” she screamed 

“Who are you” my thoughts spoke again, as I was trying to struggle my way out of my Mother’s opening. 

“It is I, who brings forth the one to be born; that which is produced. I am known as the beginning by many … I am birth! I am the time when something begins” she said screaming within my mind, as I took my first breath gasping for air 

I was chocking, struggling and gasping - suspended in mid air, drenched and dripping with my mother’s seep I was howling and she cried in my ears again “shriek!Keep the howl going, the years of misery that lay before you nameless one await you
And then the sound of madness in the room ,as her faint voice disappears from my mind it was the last time I heard of her.

By Lisbon Ferro